How (not) to: Take a Selfie

 

Ever wonder why Sarah looks so hot in her selfies and Amy looks like she is a sixty year old man with no neck? We have learned from experience how NOT to take a selfie and we are here to share it with you to spare you the looks of embarassment when your friend tags you in a pic where you look like your Great Aunt Mildred. 

I have lots of thoughts on selfies. Are they narcissistic? Do they indicate a need for approval? Do other people's hot photos make us feel better or worse about ourselves?  Today's blog post is not about the philosophy of selfies, but rather how (not) to take a selfie. Because if you are going to take a selfie, you clearly need to look like a nymph-like goddess so all of your friends will like your pic.

Here is how (not) to take a selfie.

1.  Do not crinkle the wrinkles in your forehead so you look older and more manly than you actually are.

2.  Do not squish your double chins so you look like Jabba-the-Hut.

3.  Do not post said selfie on the world wide web for all of your friends and customers to see.  

bad selfies are real bad. you would never know that amy is in fact a normal looking human, as evidenced below...

Here's how you actually SHOULD take a selfie, as demonstrated by the lovely Sarah.

1.  Tilt your head slightly forward so you look simultaneously like you are contemplating the meaning of life and getting a pedi.

2.  Filter.  Filter.  Filter.

3.  Do post said selfie on the world wide web so you can build a fan base of people who want to pet your hair and make out with you.

That's another helpful How To: from Bon Lemon. Now go take a selfie.